- Author: Phil Conquest
- Kindle Edition
- Category: Fiction, Dark Comedy
Having spent a pleasant day preparing to harness his muse and strolling around his local neighbourhood committing acts of literary vandalism, our hero contemplates his research into such matters as he prepares for his date with the gorgeous Tylissa.
The date does not work out as he had hoped. In fact, the whole night turns into a disaster of spectacular proportions, but the worst surprise of all waits for him on his return home….
Part two of the story of Inkker Hauser, Literastein, follows straight on from Rum Hijack and takes place over the course of a day. After stocking up on groceries and booze, Inkker decides he needs new clothes for his date that evening and proceeds to buy several shirts and a couple of trouser suits which would also, he thought, further his intellectual self-image. After delivering a tirade of abuse at his Twitter timeline and logging in to his account to change his name to Inkker Hauser, he has an idea and takes a trip into town.
I popped the lid off the pen and turned to the title page just inside the book. An inch or so below the title, in large letters, as neatly as I could under the circumstances, I wrote: #InkkerHauser. I put the lid on the pen quickly, closed the book, got up and returned it to the shelf. A wave of exhilaration shot through me.
Being privy to Inkker’s inner monologue and observations is fairly intense, his thoughts are quite extreme but that only makes him a more captivating protagonist, maybe in part because he’s a loner, mostly scorned by others, has a fragile grip on reality and he’s hurting. The weirdness and eccentricities are increasing. And he must be slowly killing himself with amount of alcohol he consumes.
Well lubricated before his date after several afternoon drinks in the pub, and more at home watching the video documentary of the Kursk submarine disaster, the evening was destined to be a major disaster. Inkker still firmly believes he will write the literary masterpiece he believes himself capable of, if he could just write that first elusive sentence. The more he drinks, the more he tries to impress Tylissa, the more outrageous and unpredictable his behaviour and dialogue become. His despair as the evening goes downhill with increasing speed is tangible. And when he gets home, to top it all off, he learns he has a new neighbour. This information, coupled with the events of the last few hours, sends him into a tailspin and causes quite a meltdown.
As with Rum Hijack, this is a very out of the ordinary, well written, dark, entertaining and humorous instalment in the tortuous life of our protagonist. I could pull out any number of great quotes, but the one that sticks in my mind is Inkker’s belief that there is a ‘space reserved for me in the car park of the literary kingdom.’
About the author
Phil comes from southern England and now lives in the US. He is a radical, innovative, avant-garde writer whose prose attracts readers every time it is encountered. His influences are many but he has been compared favourably with Rimbaud, Bukowski and Dosteovesky for his dark and earthy tales of outsiders on the edge.
Inkker Hauser Part 1: Rum Hijack, his debut on Amazon, is the darkly comic tale of a frustrated and slightly insane would-be writer who begins taking out his “writers’ block” on the local community. Inkker Hauser Part 2 is the follow-up and contains a hysterical, surreal and agonising karaoke sequence, which will probably never be equalled.
Rum Hijack was recently included in a list of the top 50 Best Indie books of the year in 2014.
Phil’s other main interests are music and basketball – and is a fan of the Chicago Bulls. His Bukowskiesque blog, Motel Literastein, about an Englishman living on the fringes of society and sanity in a motel in Philadelphia, is controversial, confrontational and cathartic, but never dull, beautifully written and well worth following.
He will probably never return home.