Philosophers of the 20th Century? You decide….

I received an email the other day with a load of these, some I’d read before, some I hadn’t. These are my favourites…

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind – every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder ~ John Glenn

When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land. They said, ‘Let us pray.’ We closed our eyes. When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land ~ Desmond Tutu

America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked ~ David Letterman

I’m not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. I’m a billionaire ~ Howard Hughes

After the game, the King and the pawn go in the same box ~ Old Italian proverb

Men are like linoleum floors. Lay ‘em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years ~ Betsy Salkind

The only reason they say ‘Women and children first’ is to test the strength of the lifeboats ~ Jean Kerr

You know you’re a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn’t ~ Jeff Foxworthy

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife ~ Prince Philip

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing ~ Emo Philips

Kill one man and you’re a murderer, kill a million and you’re a conqueror ~ Jean Rostand

We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here for, I have no idea ~ WH Auden

If life were fair, Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead ~ Johnny Carson

I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it ~ Robert Benchley

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